Tony and Kareem Vance remember their only head-to-head matchup on a football field like it was yesterday. In reality, it came 18 years ago up in North Mississippi, as Tony coached at Charleston High School and Kareem at West Tallahatchie.
“We were cross-county rivals and played for the Golden Egg,” recalled Tony. “It was East Tally versus West Tally, kinda like Hattiesburg-Oak Grove. We whooped them pretty good that year, too.”
Kareem agrees that was the case then and most of their childhood, actually. That never put a damper on the competition, though.
“Most of the times he’ll come out on the winning end, but we always competed,” said Kareem. “I’m known back home as just being a competitive guy, and I hate to lose.”
The brothers are alike in that way and many others. As the youngest of 13 siblings, Tony and Kareem grew up side-by-side through plenty of trials and tribulations. Their mother, Dorothy, was on dialysis for nearly 10 years before passing away while both were still young men. Before her death, the single mother did the very best she could to keep food on the table for her children, even planting a garden for the family to eat from. Still, it wasn’t always enough.
“If the garden wasn’t quite ready yet, there were some long nights where we went to bed, and we tried to drink water to fill our stomach up to the next morning,” recalled Tony. “It was just the way we came up. Mom did the best she could.
“She did instill some things in us that carry on today. That’s caring about people and being the best person you can be. That’s about helping others.”
It’s clear Tony and Kareem took that wisdom to heart. Aside from helping others, the brothers have seemingly always been there for one another, too.
Before the turn of the century, Tony gave up his football playing career after donating one of his kidneys to his mother and tearing his ACL. After her passing, he opted to just work in order to keep a roof over his and Kareem’s head. At the same time, Kareem was a top recruit coming out of Northwest Mississippi Community College. When it was all said and done, he had 18 Division I offers to his name, but one Division II program, Delta State, kept calling.
The school offered Kareem a full scholarship on the spot, but he was more concerned about his brother. When presented with the opportunity, Kareem asked Delta State assistant coach Donald Dykes, “What about my brother?”
“I was trying to get back into school so I could get my degree,” said Tony. “That was the one thing I promised my mom, that I would get my degree. So they said ‘We’ll put him on scholarship as a trainer’. He [Kareem] took that opportunity and turned down some Division I scholarships to go to Delta State University just so I could go to school for free.”
As Kareem often says, it all panned out. The dynamic duo went on to help Delta State win its first-ever conference championship in 1998.
Tony later became a graduate assistant, and that’s where he found his true calling—coaching. He went on to coach the Charleston Tigers to a state championship in 2011 before accepting the head job at Hattiesburg High School in 2013.
Tony has since built Hattiesburg into a perennial contender, which didn’t surprise Kareem in the slightest.
“He [Tony] is dedicated to what he does, and he has a knack for finding the right people and putting a staff together,” explained Kareem. “That’s the quality of a great leader, when you’re able to get a staff and get them to buy into what your vision is.
“I just think he is a genius. People may say I’m being biased, but that’s what I think.”
Last year, Tony’s Tigers played for their first state championship in nearly 20 years, and coming into 2018, expectations were sky high. Still, there was a missing piece. It was his brother, Kareem, who after his West Tallahatchie days went on to specialize in personal and athletic training.
Tony says he tried to bring Kareem on as an assistant last season, but unfortunately there were no teacher openings. This time around, though, it all worked out perfectly.
“Life is very short, and I kinda looked at things like this was a once in a lifetime opportunity when you get a opportunity to go coach with your brother at a big-time program,” said Kareem. “So when I started looking at things from that perspective, I knew I had to take advantage of it.”
Kareem now coaches Hattiesburg’s linebackers and heads up the team’s much-improved strength and conditioning program.
Said Tony, “Our kids look forward to going in the weight room now, because he [Kareem] has always got something dynamic or different than we’ve done in the past.”
Kareem brought with him to Hattiesburg two of his three sons—Hakeem and Raheem. Hakeem is a senior that’s currently committed to Baylor University, and Raheem is just a seventh grader. All told, it’s made for quite a family reunion for the Vance’s.
Tony says every day of the experience has been unique and fun.
“That’s what it’s all about, enjoying it every day and not dreading it. It’s about looking forward to every day.”
